Yearning

from yearning by Aderyn

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  • Record/Vinyl + Digital Album

    Be my Valentine!

    You'll get a little valentine's card from me as well as a download of my valentine's single 'yearning' and the bandcamp exclusive b-side 'that summer (demo)' x



    *Not actually a record/vinyl I just had to put this as a music related merch item to be able to include the digital pre-order with it. repeat! NOT A VINYL JUST A LOVELY VALENTINE'S DAY CARD

    Includes unlimited streaming of yearning via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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about

I wrote this song on the floor of my childhood bedroom in lockdown. It is a song that encapsulates the feeling of pining for someone. That exquisite, aching pain. It was the first time Id felt that way about a girl, and this is without a doubt the most vulnerable Ive ever been in a song. All those feelings were so new, so raw.

I recorded a demo that night, still sitting on the floor upstairs in my parents house. When it came to recording the track in the studio we wanted to retain that vulnerability. We didnt record to a metronome, and added wailing guitars, sweeping bowed double bass and an echoey floor tom that I wanted to sound like a heartbeat. There’s a lot of peaks and troughs dynamically and with the tempo of this song. I wanted everything musically to be dictated by emotion, not convention.

To me, this song encapsulates the sharp, sweet pain of yearning for someone. When I wrote it, I had only come out to my family as bi a few months before, and it wasnt an easy journey. There were all these thorny emotions tangled together, and at the centre, this girl. That chaotic emotional landscape is explored in the bridge as the drums, guitars and vocals reach a crescendo over the lyric ‘you’re pretty and it hurts right now’. In that moment, that simple line was the best way I could sum up my feelings. The lyrics purposefully have no resolution, no sense of closure.

lyrics

Girl Im trying to think of the right words
All I got is you’re pretty, and it hurts right now
No I can’t compare, the way you twist your hair
To some poetic phrase that I pulled out of the air
All I can assure you is I’d dive into this burning pool of cyanide to see you tonight

Oh I think Im yearning, and Im not learning anything, Im not learning anything
Feels like Im dying, and Im not gonna live again, Im not gonna live (repeats)

Thought I could control it at the start
Thought I could paint with chaos, and make us art
I was so alive, that by the time I died, my petals fell off slowly
Like a rose at your bedside

All I can assure you is Im stuck on your eyes
Stuck three months in the past girl I didnt know that you were just a fly by
And if I had then girl I would’ve treated you right.

Oh I think Im yearning, and Im not learning anything, Im not learning anything
Feels like Im dying, and Im not gonna live again, Im not gonna live (repeats)

Youre pretty and it hurts
Youre pretty and it hurts right now
(Repeat)
Hurts right now hurts right now hurts right now

Oh I think Im yearning, and Im not learning anything, Im not learning anything
Feels like Im dying,

credits

from yearning, released February 14, 2022
Music & Lyrics by Lisa Martin
Mixed and Mastered by Charlie Francis

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Aderyn London, UK

As a teenager Aderyn grew tired of life on a sheep farm in the Brecon Beacons and left home at 16 to become a drummer in a grunge band. Watching the singers run around on stage, she decided that looked like fun too. Drawing on her love of grunge rock and indie pop she wrote songs about past loves, new loves and future loves; basically, all about loves, this is pop music after all… ... more

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